Drawing a line in the sand

Thank you for joining me in my second blog. You will find that lately and probably more often than not, my blogs will be sparse. Yes I have the ranting gene, but I choose not to use it to its full extent. I will leave that to my other siblings to whom I am indebted to for the hours of blog entertainment and wisdom.

Please be warned, that there is some rough language in this blog which may shock you coming from the mouth of Pastor Ty. But I feel sometimes it is the only way to get the point across. I don’t like to add it to my daily repertoire of language, and I have never used nor do I condone the use of the Lords name in vain. Now onto the topic at hand.

There comes a time in every person’s life where you bring things to an end. “Enough is enough, that’s it I have had it, no more of this sh*t!”

For you, I don’t know what that means or where it has happened, but for me, it has been an entire life change.

So many things have brought me to this place, questions, fears, insecurities, frustration, anger, hurt, jealousy and pain. Sometimes it feels like all those things are going to break you to the point that you can no longer go on.

All my life, in my eyes, the person of Tyler has been nothing but shy, afraid of basically anything, unintelligent, and very unattractive. Not that I needed any help feeling this way, but there were some key people who did things, to speed up the destruction of the person that I am. I could thank them each personally right here in this blog, but I am not going to do that, for a man reaps what he sows.

Getting the hell beat out of me on a daily or semi daily basis at school was certainly a challenge to overcome. Being tormented about my cystic acne, even by my one of my best friends. I am not asking for your sympathy, I am simply telling some of my life.

Sitting in class as the teacher would leave for 15 minutes at a time, 4 or 5 guys grab me and throw me around the classroom, and when they needed to make it more interesting, they let the little guy take shots at me, which triggered my self defense mechanism against him (the little guy) because I knew I could actually defend myself, but my self defense got me an even worse beating from the rest of them.

Being kicked, punched, thrown across the room, pushed over desks, thrown over fences, locked in bathrooms, hit with objects, having my personal things destroyed just for a laugh, mocked, robbed, laughed at and spit on was just about what it took for me to give up, but not quite. Until I discovered that church was not even safe, I sat in Gods house only to be swore at by another kid my age, (Please excuse the language) he sat behind me, leaned forward and told me I was the ugliest f*cking thing he had ever seen, and I shouldn’t bother showing my ugly f*cking face in public because no one wanted to see it. As I went home, I said nothing and I to tried to figure out a way to kill myself, because like I said, everyone draws a line in the sand at some point in their life.

Tim Robbins said something very profound in the movie “The Shawshank Redemption”, he said “Get busy living or get busy dying”. And while he said it, someone else wrote it, so I give credit to whatever man or woman wrote that from his or her heart, but the fact remains that it touched me and probably thousands more to the realization that if you are sitting in a place of mediocrity, you need to make a change. Life is an action word, it is not a description of the force of our human bodies to function, it’s more than that. In that persons mind, death was as tragic as doing nothing. A singer name Clay Walker inspired me to live like he does, “I just want to live until I die”. Don’t get me wrong, I never want you to choose death, but you get the idea of how life is to be lived.

It’s inspiring and makes you feel good about yourself when you watch and listen to the actor say it, but there is a hard part. Because we don’t always feel like reaching for the sky, not even Tim Robbins nor the guy who wrote the line.

But here is what it takes;

it takes everything you got to fight everything that comes your way. You have to decide who and what is going to invade or be a part of your life.

I have to fight everything that told me I was ugly when I was growing up. Every hurt, every word spoken that deteriorated my self esteem in the past, I have to take by the throat and break its neck. Because the hurt doesn’t want to leave you alone, the trick is to never leave it alone. You overcome by walking tall.

When those hurts and pains grab you, and drags you into a room to fight,
you take a deep breath
and get your gloves up,
because one of you is going down with the beating of a lifetime
and it sure as hell isn’t going to be you!!!!

And there it is, your line in the sand.

Those things poke and kick and hit you enough until you give up or get tired of it and start fighting back That is where you get stronger and those things that get into your head and bother you get weaker. And let me tell you, when the weak get beaten, they get weaker, and they don’t want hang around as often.

And eventually you will find yourself in a place of bullying those emotions and the emotions of others. Those feelings of pain will be sleeping and you will kick open their door and say “wake up b*tch its almost time for your beating!”

The fight brings back the person you were meant to be. And the beauty is that once you start fighting you will never lose. Because even when you take a mind beating like I did today, where it feels like you are ready to give up, you won’t, because you will remember all the battles you have won.

I mean, they keep making Rocky movies! Just stay down!!!!! But he gets up every time. They keep making more movies!!! You got to really fight to win. You gotta want it!!!! I mean imagine if they made Canadian Rocky movies.



WHEN HE ISN’T PLAYING HOCKEY OR DRINKING CANADIAN BEER, ROCKY IS FIGHTING THE LIBERAL GOVERNMENT!


ROCKY XXXV – Rocky writes an action packed letter telling Paul Martens to “take off” and includes his concerns about how the liberal government is a bunch of hosers eh?




That is not the type of ROCKY you need to be. We need to get the real gloves on and fight back.

And you need to remember you have family and friends that love you and want to help you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.

And so I will leave you with this one piece of wisdom if I may.

If you never give up,

you will never lose.

God Bless

It bothers me

I must thank my brother for his blogs. I lauged my fool head off, and he has inspired to to create my own style of rant through Blog.



Suicide or attempted, though many times can simply be a cry for attention (which i consider a cry for help), has come to me from young people who are finding that there is no hope. I do what I can to remind them that there is hope in Christ. I know 3 people from my hometown who have comitted suicide in less than a year, so in these times, a cry for attention is always a cry for help.

I guess in this blog I want you to be more aware of people's pain than anything. Its just something i am feeling tonight and I don't know why. This is more about those who are feeling that there is nothing left. I listen to Billy Talents album and i hear the pain of a boy who was tortured in the name of "Highschool Tradition" and it bothers me. It bothers me that no one was there to help that young man. "There's nothing to lose, when no one knows your name" Billy Talent. How could anyone in that position not feel this way?

Now to what else is bothering me

It bothers me that we have a moment of silence and a prayer in church for those lost lives in our hometown this past week through suicide or other causes, that we shed the tears and hold each other, and then head off to the church potluck.

It bothers me that certain music leaders (no one specific) weap and wail asking for "more of God", when the "more" comes when we do what He asked us to do and feed the poor, cloth the naked, bring the gospel.

It bothers me when well off Christians ask for "more" from God (you know, financially), and have no concern for those who have much less.

It bothers me that my former church has a Pastor that is more concerned about reputation than doing the will of the Father.

It bothers me that my former Pastor pushes those that struggle with particular sin back into hiding.

It bothers me that there is no reason we can't change, but we still don't.

It bothers me that 3 people have comitted suicide in the past year, and nothing has changed. I still see no outreach.

It bothers me that I have no church to invite those who do not yet believe in Jesus Christ.

It bothers me that some Christians give so called "unbelievers" leprosy status.

It bothers me that a young girl is doing Christianity on her own without the support of her family and no one seems to understand how hard that is for her.

It bothers me that I show up for every single youth event and church service, i pray, i organize, i teach, i love and i care, i give of my time and myself and all i get at board meetings is a general report on what I am doing wrong.

It bothers me that those who don't go to church think we huddle up in masses every Sunday and sing and pray in order to make heaven, thats not the part that bothers me, the part that bothers me is that we are ok with them thinking these things. I may be stepping out of line, but on the CARE BEAR CARING METER, the needle is sitting on "who gives a rats ass" (pardon the language) so here goes

It bothers me that maybe what they think of us is true.

Ouch, how was that? Tough to swallow? Hard to get down??? Yea well sometimes the truth is a peanutbutter and craker sandwich, so wash it down with a gallon of get over yourself and lets move on.

I think its time for me to stop. But you get an idea of what is on my heart and what is bothering me.