Thank You

I know I wrote a blog just yesterday, but I have more in my head and on my heart.

I love living on a kind of an "acreage" with my 2 brothers. Our house is awesome, we have a pool (thought is a little one) and even though it takes 2 hours to mow all the grass, I must say, it is beautiful. We are right on the edge of town, but it feels like the country more than anything.

I feel so thankful that we are able to live here. Its a beautiful spot, the house is big with lots of space, I have 4 tall windows in my bedroom that stretch down close to the floor right next to my bed, so when I wake up in the morning I can see the beauty that God has created. We pay almost nothing for rent, utilities are next to nothing, and on top of that we split it 3 ways and all 3 of us brothers get along basically all of the time. We have deer in our yard every few days and there are now 2 bunnies that I believe are living in our bushes. They are the cutest little guys you have ever seen and they came right up to the deck the other day. Maybe I will leave some carrots out for them?

So I have a lot to be thankful for today, so thank you God for animals in my yard, thanks for our awesome house, the huge yard and beautiful trees, for the big windows in my bedroom and thank you that it is nice, quiet and peaceful on our land!

What do you have to be thankful for today?

Dwell Put

Man that is such a lame title, sorry, I couldn't think of anything clever. It was either that or "Sleep Dwell" or "D well is deep", yea they are all kind of lame.

Talking to friends of mine this past week has helped me to realize that many of life’s problems can be created, prolonged and eventually overcome with one word. Dwell. As humans we are constantly searching for answers, and with more answers come new questions. I think that when we can’t find the answers, our flow of trying to be complete is interrupted and we get stuck in areas because we need answers or we need to feel ok about what has affected us.

Dwell - To fasten one's attention. Don’t dwell on bad things! Easier said than done right? I mean, for example, your girlfriend leaves you. She says nothing, and you feel so hurt. And you dwell on why and possibly how can I make it work again? You dwell on the pain. So a quick solution to the problem - stop dwelling on those things. If we could do that at the drop of a hat I am sure we would. But we can’t. But something I have learned is that what you do dwell on will come to be most important in your brain.

I once talked to a married man about his marriage. He had been married just under 10 years. He expressed his dissatisfaction with the physical relationship with is wife. He explained how I didn’t understand because I was not married and didn’t even have a girlfriend. I said maybe I didn’t, but that I knew a few things about life. I asked him what he had done to romance his wife, to get her interested to win her heart. He looked puzzled at me. He said “we are already married; I don’t need to win her over.” I paused, looked him straight in the eye and said slowly “Yes, you do”. I said how often do you think about her during your day? How often do you think about what a perfect date for you and her would be, what would make a beautiful evening for you both? When did you last cook supper for you and the family and do the dishes? When did you even take her out last for supper, just you and her? He said life was really busy. I simply said to him, “When you put her on your mind, you will begin to love her and serve her more. And things might not feel exciting for you, but do it for her, you will learn to love and serve her, and eventually she will respond to you, then learn to do everyday things to show you love her, simple things” Finally after a while of talking with him, I said “Look man, you take that beautiful wife of yours out for a romantic evening. And be creative. Make it different, integrate things she likes into your evening, make it special, you are a smart man!” “Be a man and love your wife!!!” I don’t think he went away really inspired, and maybe even a little ticked at me for thinking I knew what I was talking about, but you know what? He did what I told him to anyways and I have never seen 2 people more in love. They have their problems, but I can see that they are now serving each other on a daily basis. And he is much happier not only in his physical relationship with his wife, but in all aspects of his marriage. It wasn't just the date that changed his marraige, he had to work at it, but now they are both very happy and are both working hard at it. He says they enjoy more time together talking, going on dates and just being together. And I am really happy for them!

Well that was a long story, but the truth is that when he put his mind on his wife, he began to realize the beautiful person that she was. It’s easy at first I assume, because young love is just that way and i believe that young love is a gift from God, but as you grow, servant hood needs to be key, if you serve each other form the start, it will be a habit to continue. And I think that maybe our relationship with God is like that. We enjoy our new love relationship with God, and as it matures, we lose touch with the basics. But if we try to dwell on God, even if it feels fake or that it is not working, we might find that what happens is that relationship is rebuilt and there is a “renewing of our minds”.

I know that when we dwell on things they become what is most important in our lives. When my fiancée left me 8 years ago, I spent 2 years dwelling. And not that all of that was wasted time, some of it was grieving time for what I had lost, I needed time to reflect as well. But not having closure and not being able to move on after some time has passed was like planting a “weed seed” in my mind. And that weed seed grows and chokes out the flowers and other beautiful things trying to grow in your mind.

I encourage you all to dwell on the beautiful things in life, Dwell on God. We don’t need to be robots and pretend that there are no disappointments, and life is perfect, I agree with Lynnel and Kristy-Anne as well, we do need to examine our lives, it is very important. I am so glad I get to read their blogs and I thank them for sharing their hearts, because one way I grow is from the wisdom of others, they always keep me thinking. This blog is something different I am not out to debate their points at all, I agree with them very much. I had a friend today who is having trouble with letting go of someone and the word “Dwell” has been on my mind these last few days, so I wanted to write my thoughts down. I’m not out to step on anyone’s toes, so I hope I don’t make anyone feel that way.

God Bless

Ty

She had no idea

This was originally going to be a comment to Kristy-Anne's recent blog, but it was getting far too long. On Saturday morning I left my house, my 2 brothers still asleep and my cat roaming around. I was a beautiful sunny day. I was driving downtown towards the other side of town to head to mom and dads, I was going to borrow their long garden hose to fill up my pool, and as I drove along side the tracks, I saw a train sitting still which was very peculiar, as I drove closer to the crossing, I saw an ambulance and a fire truck. And as I drove further down the street, parallel to the tracks I saw a car, it was partially covered with a tarp. It was the car of someone I knew. She was a sweet old lady and I am not exactly sure what happened with regards to the details of the accident, but that day, she died. When I was a mechanic I had changed the oil on her car several times. I remember driving her home, to drop her off while I took the car back to the shop to change her oil. She would tell me how much she loved her grand children. She was quite excited that she had a grandson named Tyler, the same as me! She lived a ways out of town, so she would tell me all the stories she could about her grand children. I loved to listen to her, she was so sweet, and I love children very much so I really did enjoy her stories and got involved in the conversation. Her name was Gladys. She loved to go yard saleing on Saturdays, and I assume she was on her way to one that day. But she had no idea that her time here on earth was up. And reading Kristy-Anne's blog got me thinking, and I don't know when my time is up. None of us do. And I imagine most people involved in tragic accidents hardly get a chance to say Oops just before they die. Its so heartbreaking, no good byes, no closure. It was her time to go, and just like that she was taken. I pray for her family who will miss her so much. I pray the peace of God will bring comfort. And I take this opportunity to remember how precious life is and I reflect upon all the things I have and all the things God has done for me. And remember, its ok for things like this to affect us, even if we didn’t know the person well. It is one way we remember to value life and reflect upon our own lives.

The Ego Has landed

Ok basically i love every person on the planet. I just do. And sometimes, just every once in a while some people need a little foot-to-rear-end encouragement. Being that I am the king of all humility (insert audience laughter here), am currently wearing my lawn mowing shoes today and am not really afraid to get them dirty, and having read some comments in my brothers blog that indicated he was probably not a Christian, not to mention the judgmental attitudes that were directed towards him as a person, I would like to take this opportunity to shine the tip of my shoe and get my leg in full swing for some gentle encouragement.

Plank Eye - What a great name for a band! And basically it is my theory that we should all have this tattooed on our foreheads because every time we saw those words we would remember to examine our own lives first. And for all those who have a judgmental attitude, could you please stop having a judgmental attitude? Sounds like a stupid question to ask doesn’t it? Well once, I had someone who was stealing from me. So I left a note asking if he would stop stealing from me, and he did, so I was hoping it might work here too.

Salvation - I don’t need to go through the stories about what happened with my brother and comments made by others, my brother didn’t even do anything remotely wrong, he is a Christian, and a very encouraging one at that. I am not really angry, I am more hurt that some Christians keep judging other people’s walk with Christ. Let’s look at the facts. Jesus died on a cross so that we could have eternal life. Sin is paid for. Your sins will not cause you to go to hell, they will if you are not a Christian. If I swear before I get hit by a truck am I doomed to an eternity in hell? If so, what was Jesus death and resurrection all for? So then can someone who is a Christian doing a sinful thing go to heaven? Not looking for excuses to sin or anything, just getting a measure on the meter of Gods grace. I even put out the argument can a homosexual go to heaven? How far does God’s grace extend? If he believes in Christ will he see the Kingdom of Heaven? A person I know, who is well known for gossiping and slanderous acts with her tongue, which I have experienced first hand, once answered that question with these words “No way, if he was a Christian he wouldn’t live that kind of a lifestyle”. The word hypocrisy crossed my mind. Sometimes I wonder if we are too eager to turn some Christians into what we think they should be. Is that not the job of the Holy Spirit? We are to strive for perfection, but when one of us doesn’t appear to have it, he is seen as falling behind.

Encouragement, rebuke and nitpicking – I really think we have the wrong idea on the subject of rebuke, so I, having all the answers (audience applause and subtle laughter), will instruct you properly. No, just jokin, I am just giving my opinions on the issue. It seems to me that what is coming from some of us who wish to give correction, ends up turning into judgment. Correction always comes with prayer, and is in the context of brotherhood/sisterhood and love. I strongly believe correction comes out of a genuine love and concern for the other person’s life. Correction should come with the thought and consideration of the issues possibly causing pain or difficulties in that brother or sister’s life. If you are unsure of that person’s faith be careful, if we judge, we do nothing to bring them closer to Christ.

Wisdom is not knowledge, wisdom comes from God, and when you read your Bible, you will find that those who had wisdom also took lessons in humility. I encourage all of us to not throw the book at those whom you do not know. For example I know my brother Brodie well, I know his heart, I know some of his faults, I point out things he needs to work on and he listens to me, and he does the same for me and the reason this works is because he knows I love him and I care about his life. He knows I am not judgmental, I point out things because I care for him and I want to see him walk right with the Lord, I am not out to nitpick and I always encourage him in the things he does well and tell him of the things that I admire about him.

Furthermore, I would not do any correction in public for everyone to hear or read. It says in Gods word to go to your brother, not to attempt to show your wisdom, or to show that you think you are right in front of everyone by judging someone according to how you see Gods word or how you feel they should be living, not only does that make you look judgmental, but it makes Christians look judgmental. Judgment brings about destruction, but humility and gentleness towards those whom you are trying to reach will build bridges from them to God. If you are going to go to someone, be honest with yourself, you can say “I am going out of love and concern for my brother/sister”, but do you feel it in your heart?

I know I need to start writing things that are less serious, but this was on my heart today.

Shameless plug – check out my new book

www.freewebs.com/capturedimagination

The Heart and The Imagination

Hi, just wanted to let you all know that I have just finished writing my very first book and it is called "The Heart and The Imagination". Its a great acomplishment for me. Its something I have always wanted to do. Right now the book material is at the printers and I should have them by the middle or end of next week if you are interested in getting a copy.

Thank you all for the encouragement while i was working to get this book finished. It was and is muchly appreciated.

I have a temperary Website if you wish to e-mail me about the book, order a book, or look at information about "The Heart and The Imagination".

www.freewebs.com/capturedimagination

Also feel free to check out my personal website

www.freewebs.com/tylerhay

God Bless

Tyler